Retro Rowe: WWE Over the Limit 2010 Review

WWE Over the Limit - May 23, 2010

by SamoaRowe

-Live, from St. Louis, MI. Our hosts are Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, and Matt Striker.

Intercontinental Championship:
Drew McIntyre © vs. Kofi Kingston
Hot start to pop the crowd by Kofi. Drew injures Kofi’s back and takes advantage. Kofi finds an opening with a hip toss, but Drew kicks the midsection and proceeds to target it. Drew goes top rope and is countered. Kofi goes on the offense and speeds things up. Kofi botches a landing on the ropes but delivers a flying cross body. Big gut buster by Drew. Kingston nails the boom drop on Drew, who is propped on the ropes. Drew blocks Trouble in Paradise but eats the S.O.S. Kofi wins at 6:23! This was basically an abbreviated version of the WWE midcard formula match, **.
Winner and new Intercontinental Champion: Kofi Kingston

WWE Extreme Rules - April 25, 2010
by SamoaRowe

-This year’s Wrestlemania backlash will be extreme! Fasten your seatbelts.

-From Baltimore, MD.

-Triple H’s music plays but he’s nowhere to be seen. We discover that Sheamus has attacked him backstage and they are brawling. Referees pull Triple H off, giving Sheamus a chance to strike with a steel pipe.

-Unified Tag Team Champions Big Show and Miz come down to the ring. It turns out they are here to excite the crowd since the street fight got delayed. Miz brags about how fantastic they are and demands some competition. Theodore Long steps up to the plate and forces them into a tag team gauntlet match! The longer Miz talks, the more teams Long adds to the match. If Miz and Show lose, they’ll defend the belts against the winning team the next night on Raw.

Tag Team gauntlet match:
Miz and Show are up against John Morrison and R-Truth. Former partners Miz and Morrison miss a chance to show off how well they know each other. Miz gets double teamed and makes a tag. Show swats Truth down and isolates him. Morrison gets a lukewarm tag and attempts to clean house on Big Show. Morrison counters a choke slam with a modified triangle choke. Truth dispatches Miz to ringside, but Morrison is disqualified for holding onto the hold in the ropes at 3:15.

Mark Henry and MVP are the next team! MVP attempts a quick pin on Show. Miz tags and runs into a clothesline. Henry tags and overpowers an isolated Miz. MVP unloads his arsenal but can’t pick up a victory. Playmaker by Miz, but Show saves with a punch to the head. Miz pins MVP at 5:45.

The final team is the Hart Dynasty, accompanied by Natalya and Bret Hart! They immediately hit the Hart Attack on Miz for the win at 6:19. They celebrate with Bret to general crowd approval. This really didn’t do any favors for the participants, other than a feel good moment for the Harts at the end, *½.

Winners: Tyson Kidd and David Hart Smith

Retro Rowe: WWE Wrestlemania 26

WWE WrestleMania 26 - March 28, 2010

by SamoaRowe

I watched the show live last weekend with some friends. It wasn't the "greatest of all time" but it was still a fine show. It was also the first full wrestling event I've watched in HD, so I think I was noticing a lot more of the botches than I normally would, as there seemed to be quite a few scattered throughout the evening.

Unified Tag Team Championship: ShoMiz vs. John Morrison/R-Truth
You could tell from the opening bell that this was going to be short, as they wasted no time hitting their key spots and signature moves. The match only went a little over 3 minutes, so while obviously robbed for time, it was an enjoyable 3 minutes. I'm mainly glad that the tag titles weren't kicked down to dark match status. *1/2.

Randy Orton vs. Ted Dibiase vs. Cody Rhodes
I think I liked this more than most people, as the general perception is that Rhodes and Dibiase came off as the two biggest jobbers who ever jobbed before. They held their own up until Orton took advantage of their dissension and punted Rhodes in the head and RKO'd Dibiase for victory. The more troubling aspect here is how after two solid years of being pushed heavily that the crowd didn't care one bit for either Legacy member. **1/2.

Money in the Bank
Generally brutal and exciting, as usual, just missing the one or two really big !!! spots. The highlight was easily Evan Bourne's Shooting Star Press off a ladder. Sadly, Kofi Kingston botches a run up a ladder for a corner attack. I have to admit, that I did not see the Jack Swagger victory coming, nor did I see him cashing it in less than a week later. I enjoyed this and I liked seeing most of the guys in the match get a spot at Wrestlemania (though again, it's kind of sad just how not over Drew McIntyre is despite months of an aggressive push).

Triple H vs. Sheamus
A lot of folks out there are claiming that Triple H's victory here means that Sheamus is finished. That really isn't the case, as this was a competitive 12 minute match and the feud doesn't seem to be over. There is a big difference between HHH nailing the pedigree on Booker T and waiting an eternity to pin him and Sheamus eating the pedigree and getting pinned immediately after. This was about what I expected, **1/2.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio
Like the opening match, I could sense this was going to be quick just by how they were pacing themselves from the opening bell. They packed a lot of action into the 6-7 minutes they got. They even squeazed in a good story, with Punk outsmarting Mysterio most steps of the way, including numerous blocks/reversals of the 619. Ultimately, Rey got the win, so all the kids in the stadium got a feel-good moment. It doesn't appear this feud is over either. **1/2.

Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon
This was a mess. It went about 11 minutes, which was about 10 minutes too long. Normally these Vince at 'Mania matches are entertaining train wrecks, but it was like they didn't even try, especially with Vince carting out the entire Hart family and Hart Dynasty from the very beginning, claiming he had paid them off to betray Bret. Even Stevie Wonder could see the coming swerve, as it turns out they took Vince's money and decided to screw him. Bret awkwardly beat down Vince while the crowd waited patiently for the sharpshooter. No rating, but this was bad.

World Heavyweight Championship: Chris Jericho vs. Edge
I really enjoyed this one and got sucked in by it. I was so happy when Jericho won, that it feels a bit more frustrating that he reign would end two days later at the Smackdown tapings. It was also surprising that Jericho got a semi-clean victory, as Edge had foiled his cheating attempts up until the Codebreaker finished things after about 16 minutes. I thought for sure that this was just going to be false finish, so when the referee counted 3 it got quite the surprised reaction from me. I have a feeling that repeated viewings will cause my heart to grow fonder of this bout, but for now I'd peg it at ***1/2.

Divas Tag
This worked a lot better than last year's disasterous battle royal, but still was not a good match by any stretch of the imagination. It was basically each diva hitting the one good move they each know until Vickie attempted a frog splash and won the match. Seriously, Vickie's splash is bound to go down in history as one of the all-time great bad moments in wrestling. *

WWE Championship: Batista vs. John Cena
Maybe it was the HD, but I found this to be largely sloppy and something of a mess up until things got hot down the final stretch. They packed in a lot of reversals and counters that might have been awesome if not for the fact they were so badly executed. Despite all that, I was pretty into the match, and the finish was satisfying. Repeat viewings might help this one as well, ***.

Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker
My sense as the bell rang here was that this match would make or break this show. The stipulations here added a lot, as I couldn't really imagine either man winning because what it would mean for the other. I enjoyed watching this more than I have any other live match in years. The final stretch, where Undertaker helped Shawn up, only to get slapped, and responding with a jumping tombstone piledriver was a fantastic moment and a fitting way for Shawn Michaels to call it a career. I liked this more than last year's Shawn/Taker match, ****3/4.

Retro Rowe: WWE Elimination Chamber 2010

WWE Elimination Chamber

February 21, 2010

by Samoa Rowe

-From St. Louis, MO. Our hosts are Matt Striker, Michael Cole, and Jerry Lawler.

WWE Championship (Elimination Chamber):
Sheamus © vs. John Cena vs. Ted Dibiase vs. Randy Orton vs. Triple H vs. Kofi Kingston

Kingston checks his back during his entrance, a clever nod to him getting ambushed at last year’s event. Sheamus poses with the WWE title in front of each pod, which is pretty awesome. Sheamus and Kingston start the match and have a nice back and forth exchange. Kofi blocks a hip toss onto the steel and lands a high cross body. Sheamus takes control after hitting some back attacks. 5 minutes have passed and Triple H is let out of his pod. Triple H and Sheamus have a heated confrontation and a slugfest breaks out. HHH, the seasoned veteran, takes control. Triple H blocks the Celtic Cross and nails a DDT for 2. Kingston rejoins the fight with a cross body on Sheamus. Kofi unleashes Controlled Frenzy and the Boom Drop on Triple H on the steel. Sheamus gains control of Kofi. With 10 minutes gone, Randy Orton charges out of his pod and he cleans house on everyone. Orton repeatedly smashes Sheamus and then Triple H into the chain wall. Kingston wipes everyone out with a cross body over the ropes. Orton counters Kofi with a drop-kick. HHH squares off with Orton and eats a scoop slam. A flurry of near finishers breaks out. With over 15 minutes gone, Ted Dibiase joins the match. Dibiase considers whether or not to attack his mentor, Orton. Dibiase decides to help Orton back up and they start working together. Legacy forces Kofi’s head through the chain wall for a vicious attack. Legacy turns their attention to Triple H. Dibiase suggests that Orton deliver the spike DDT onto the steel and it connects! Dibiase and Orton stand outside Cena’s pod as it opens at the 21 minute mark. Cena fights his way out of the chamber and cleans house on Legacy. Cena drops Dibiase onto the steel with an Attitude Adjustment! Orton saves Dibiase from the STF and signals the RKO. Cody Rhodes runs in and slips a lead pipe to Dibiase. Typically, Dibiase accidentally clocks Orton with the pipe, before dropping Cena. Dibiase eliminates Orton at 23:55! Orton realizes what’s happened and gives Dibiase the “I’ll deal with you later” look before leaving. Sadly, Kingston plants Dibiase for an elimination at 25:25. Sheamus drops Kofi with a Brogue Kick. The Celtic Cross finishes Kofi at 26:06. Sheamus turns his attention to Cena and nails a backbreaker. Sheamus punishes Cena in a tree of woe. Triple H saves Cena from the Celtic Cross with a low blow. The Pedigree finishes Sheamus at 28:30! The WWE Champion has been eliminated! We’re down to Cena and Triple H. Cena locks on the STF and Triple H taps at 30:16. This was pretty tame by EC standards, but it told several stories and nicely set up a bunch of Wrestlemania matches, ***¾.
Winner and new WWE Champion: John Cena

Retro Rowe: WWE Royal Rumble 2010

WWE Royal Rumble

January 31, 2010

by Samoa Rowe

-From Atlanta, GA. Our hosts are Michael Cole, Matt Striker, and Jerry Lawler.

-Savannah is our official ECW ring announcer! I’m surprised TNA hasn’t hired her yet and then acted surprised when their fans didn’t recognize her.

ECW Championship:
Christian © vs. Ezekiel Jackson (with William Regal)

This would prove to be the final ECW title match ever on pay-per-view, as the brand was soon scrapped in favor of NXT. Jackson has a clear size advantage and forces Christian to get creative. Jackson gets flustered but manages to hit a short arm clothesline to take control. Christian counters a press slam and delivers some attacks to the head. Jackson knocks Christian off the turnbuckles to regain his momentum. Regal gets kicked out of the arena for coming too close to Christian at ringside. Jackson dead lifts Christian off them at for a choke slam and continues an extended beating. Jackson’s superplex to blocked and Christian nails a flying uppercut. Christian makes his comeback with quick attacks. Christian’s diving head butt misses and he eats a clothesline for 2. Christian absorbs a backbreaker and delivers a tornado DDT! They trade counters until Christian delivers the Killswitch to retain at 11:57! This was a surprisingly game opener, **¾.
Winner and still ECW Champion: Christian

Retro Rowe: WWE TLC 2009 Review

WWE Tables, Ladders, and Chairs
December 13, 2009by Samoa Rowe
-From San Antonio, TX. Our hosts are Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, and Matt Striker.

ECW Championship (Ladder match):
Christian (c) vs. Shelton Benjamin

They have a basic back and forth match in the early going. They battle for control of a ladder at ringside. Christian nails a top rope dive to earn control of the ladder. Christian climbs but Benjamin cuts him off. Benjamin (almost) lands on his feet on a sunset flip and sprints up but ends up getting tossed to ringside. Christian lifts the ladder but gets tripped up and gets smashed in the forehead. Benjamin stalls for time while a medic attends to Christian's open wound. For some reason they battle on a ringside ladder and Benjamin hits a scary somersault senton to the floor. Shelton props a ladder up on the announce table and apron and they fight around it. They trade ladder attacks in the ring. Christian gets knocked off the ladder and eats a spinning heel kick. Benjamin climbs but Christian nails an inverted DDT. Christian tries to ram Shelton off the turnbuckles with the ladder, but Shelton counters and leans the ladder into a winning position! Christian tips it, but Shelton lands on the turnbuckles gracefully! Shelton leans the ladder on purpose to come crashing down on Christian! That exchange was awesome! The fight continues with Benjamin power slamming Christian off the ladder. Shelton grabs the belt but gets the ladder pulled out from under him. Shelton is hanging for a while before Christian climbs up and knocks him off. Benjamin returns the favor, leaving Christian hanging. Christian falls into a power bomb into a ladder! Christian counters a sunset flip power bomb! Shelton attempts a German suplex onto the propped ladder, but it's blocked. Christian frog splashes Shelton on the ladder! Benjamin is dead so Christian easily climbs and grabs his title at 18:02! This started out as a basic ladder match, but then they started taking risks that really paid off, ***¼.
Winner and still ECW Champion: Christian

Retro Rowe: WWE Bragging Rights 2009 Review

WWE Bragging Rights

October 25, 2009by Samoa Rowe

-From Pittsburgh, PA. Our hosts are Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, and Jerry Lawler.

-The theme for tonight is “Raw vs. Smackdown.” The brand split was on it’s last legs as even by this time Raw and Smackdown guys would show up on the other show on a fairly regular basis.

United States Champion The Miz vs. Intercontinental Champion John Morrison

Hey, these two used to be a successful tag team! And they both hold secondary titles! I know why they’re fighting! I’m just impressed it’s on pay-per-view and not in an unadvertised 3-minute match on Raw.
Morrison shines in an early mat-based exchange. Miz fights back but Morrison shows off with a standing shooting star press. Miz tosses Morison, but spends too much time gloating. Miz stumbles out of a pinning predicament, they sloppily counter each other, and Miz gets dumped to the floor. Miz counters and sends Morrison crashing to the floor. Miz takes control and targets the back. Morrison takes a beating but finds his second wind. Morrison goes for the pinfall but Miz gets a foot on the ropes. Miz rolls out to avoid Starship Pain but eats a corkscrew plancha to the floor. Miz rebounds with a double axe handle off the top. Morrison counters the Skull Crushing Finale but Starship Pain is countered as well. Miz quickly makes the cover for the win at 10:52! This was a lively opener, just a bit sloppy at times, **½.
Winner: The Miz

Retro Rowe: WWE One Night Stand 2009 Review

WWE Extreme Rules - June 7, 2009
by SamoaRowe

-From New Orleans, Louisiana.

United States Championship:
Kofi Kingston © vs. Matt Hardy vs. William Regal vs. MVP
Four-way stand off to begin things, with Regal sacrificing Hardy to MVP and Kingston (who form an alliance in the early going). Kingston hits a dive to the floor and follows up with a flying cross body for a near fall on Regal. Kofi and MVP butt heads, perhaps by accident, as things hit an awkward pause. Kofi livens things up but gets pummeled by Regal. MVP botches a powerbomb of Kofi and Regal off the top. Hardy tries to capitalize with a series of near falls. Kingston takes the fight to Matt and slams Regal onto him. Regal just barely breaks up a Kofi pinfall. Kofi tries to keep the ring clear, but Regal suplexes him into Hardy. MVP tries to pick up the scraps, but Hardy stops his momentum. MVP drops the ballin’ elbow but Regal breaks the count. Regal tries to clean the ring, but Kingston bounces off the ropes and hits Trouble in Paradise to retain the gold at 6:43. Rushed and sloppy, though Regal almost saved this, *½.
Winner and still United States Champion: Kofi Kingston

Retro Rowe: WWE Judgment Day 2009 Review

WWE Judgment Day - May 17, 2009
by SamoaRowe

-From Chicago, IL. Welcome to the annual event that might as well be renamed “$40 Build to Extreme Rules.”

CM Punk vs. Umaga
Punk is the hometown boy, so naturally the crowd is hot for him and naturally he’s going to lose. Punk uses his quickness in the early going but Umaga is a strong sumbitch and easily turns the tide. Once Umaga takes the upper hand, he hangs on to it, with the match seemingly becoming an extended squash for a long duration. Umaga smartly works the shoulder, weakening it for his claw grip. Punk is kicked off the apron and comes back with a sunset flip attempt, but Umaga blocks and crashes all his weight down on Punk’s chest. The beat-down continues, with Punk showing signs of life here and there. The tide turns after Umaga misses a diving head butt. Punk connects with a dive to the floor and enjoys a nice comeback, with a few near falls sprinkled in. Umaga reverses Go To Sleep with a Samoan Drop and gets 2.5. Punk dodges the Spike and connects with some hard kicks. Punk is too hurt to hit Go to Sleep and eats an onslaught of punishment, with Umaga putting him away with the Samoan Spike at 11:52. This surpassed my expectations by building up to a very hot finish, **½.
Winner: Umaga

Retro Rowe: WWE Backlash 2009 Review

WWE Backlash - April 26, 2009
by SamoaRowe

-Live from Providence, Rhode Island. Jim Ross, Michael Cole, and Jerry Lawler are on commentary.

ECW Championship:
Jack Swagger © vs. Christian
Swagger starts strong, targeting the waist and head. Christian slaps the taste out of Swagger’s mouth and outsmarts, nailing a flying elbow. Headlock by Christian. Shoulder tackles by Swagger and a press slam to the floor! Swagger chokes at ringside and brings Christian back in the hard way. Waist lock by Swagger, into a cover for 2. More waist lock goodness. Swagger counters a clever attack by Christian, stomping him to the mat with authority. Bear hug by Swagger, who lowers Christian’s shoulders down for a cover. Swagger keeps the bear hug locked on. Christian battles out and escapes a press slam. Swagger quickly nails a gut buster for 2. Another waist lock by Swagger. Hard whip by Swagger, but Christian counters into a rope assisted kick. Swagger plants Christian and goes for a bomb off the turnbuckle but it’s countered. Christian is fired up and unleashes a number of strikes. Swagger blocks a DDT but gets caught in a sunset flip for 2.5. Power slam by Swagger. Christian blocks the gut-wrench suplex but gets driven into the turnbuckle. Tornado DDT by Christian gets 2.5! They battle onto the apron, where Swagger attempts a deadly suplex. Christian blocks and flips Swagger back into the ring. Christian goes high risk, but Swagger counters with a back drop off the top! Vader Bomb by Swagger gets 2.9! Christian slaps the face and counters Swagger with a pinning predicament for 2.5. Swagger plants Christian for 2.5. Swagger unties some turnbuckle padding , but Christian does the same. Christian drives Swagger into the exposed steel and nails the Killswitch for the victory at 11:00. This was all over the place at times, but Swagger busted out some cool tricks and Christian took him to school for an exciting opener, ***.
Winner and new ECW Champion: Christian

Retro Rowe: WWE Cyber Sunday 2008 Review

-It’s time for the WWE.com preshow! Todd Grisham is here to handle the festivities. Jim Ross and Tazz are on commentary. Benjamin will be facing R-Truth, MVP, or Festus. R-Truth wins with 59% of the votes.

United States Championship:
Shelton Benjamin © vs. R-Truth
Benjamin seems to be just as annoyed with Truth’s attempts to get “What’s up” over as a catchphrase as I am. They lock up with Benjamin gaining the upper hand. Truth slugs back and dances around the ring to avoid Benjamin’s offense. Big kick by Truth throws Benjamin off his game. Benjamin fights back with a hard kick to the face, gets a cover for 2. Chinlock by Benjamin. Truth elbows out and trades shots. Benjamin reverses an Irish whip but misses a corner splash. Series of clotheslines by Truth and the corkscrew forearm. Truth goes high risk but Benjamin leaps up. Truth blocks the superplex and connects with a missile drop-kick. Cover by Truth gets 2.5! Truth runs into a leaping DDT and gets pinned at 3:24. Short, but lively, *½.
Winner and still United States Champion: Shelton Benjamin

Retro Rowe: WWE Unforgiven 2008

-Originally written in the fall of 2008. I was such a mark during this time, though I fancied myself a smarkety smart mark. 

-Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho settle their score and all three brand championships are defended in “innovative” scramble matches. The rules don’t favor the champions, so it will be a real trick for Triple H, CM Punk, and Mark Henry to hang on to their title belts.

-They are airing live from Cleveland, Ohio. Our hosts for the evening are Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler for Raw, Jim Ross and Tazz for Smackdown, and Todd Grisham and Matt Striker for ECW.

ECW Championship Scramble:
Mark Henry © (with Tony Atlas) vs. Matt Hardy vs. The Miz vs. Finlay (with Hornswoggle) vs. Chavo Guerrero (with Bam Neely)
Each of these scrambles has a 20 minute time limit, two superstars start the match and a new star arrives every five minutes, whoever gets a pinfall is the temporary champion, and whoever is the champ at the end of the match is the official title holder.

Matt Hardy and The Miz are the first two participants. They exchange holds in the early going. Things pick up with The Miz hitting a hip toss and targeting the head. The Miz blocks a bulldog, but unwittingly hangs himself up in the turnbuckle. Hardy hits an innovative sit-out power bomb and gets a 2 count. Clothesline by Hardy gets another 2. Miz hangs Hardy on the second rope and dives over to target the head. Cover by Miz gets 2, leading to a chinlock. Sunset flip by Hardy, but Miz blocks the cover. Clothesline by Miz gets a near fall. Miz hits the Reality Check, but Hardy rolls from the ring. By the time Miz gets him in a pinning predicament, Hardy easily kicks out. Five minutes have passed, and Chavo Guerrero enters the fray. Chavo disposes of Miz and hits Hardy with the frog splash to become the temporary ECW Champion. The crowd actually popped for that too, which I find surprising. The Miz goes on the offense against Chavo. Rolling Liger kick by Chavo sends Miz to the floor, setting up a dive. Hardy is up and goes after Chavo. The Miz goes high risk, but is met by Chavo. Miz knocks him off, and hits a flying cross body on both Hardy and Guerrero! Hardy cleans house. Side effect on Chavo by Hardy is enough for a three count, making him the current ECW Champion. Hardy dumps Guerrero and works a headlock on Miz. Things lead to a stand-off.

Ten minutes have passed, and Mark Henry confidently makes his way to the match. Miz, Hardy, and Guerrero try to triple team Henry, but he effortlessly throws them off. Henry cleans house. Henry slams Chavo and temporarily regains his ECW Championship. Hardy slingshots himself into Henry’s fist and tumbles to the floor. Henry continues to dish out the punishment to Guerrero and Miz. Chavo finds himself stuck in the world’s strongest bear bug. Hardy attempts a high risk move but Henry catches him with another bear hug. 15 minutes have passed and the final man, Finlay, joins the match. Hornswoggle immediately hides under the ring, as Finlay strikes Henry with a DDT, trying to get the quick pin. Henry uses yet another bear hug to slow down Finlay. Hornswoggle provides the distraction, and Finlay knocks Henry with the shillelagh. Hardy assists in dumping Henry, but Finlay strikes Hardy with the Celtic Cross. Finlay becomes the temporary ECW Champion! Missile drop-kick by Miz takes out Finlay. Hardy hit’s the twist of fate on Miz and wins the title! Frog splash on Miz by Chavo almost gets a pin, but it’s broken by the others. Henry returns and his pinfall attempt on Miz is also interrupted. Hardy keeps breaking up Henry's frequent pinfall attempts. Finlay attempts the Celtic Cross on Hardy, but Henry breaks it up. Henry and Hardy are on a virtual stand-off as less than a minute remains. All five men are all over each other as the time expires and Hardy is declared the winner at 20:00! There were some slow parts, but this did a great job of establishing the scramble rules and setting the tone for the evening, ***.
Winner and new ECW Champion: Matt Hardy

Retro Rowe: Summerslam 2008 Review

-Originally written in August 2008. 

-Welcome to the "Biggest Blockbuster of the Summer!" Tonight, Cena and Batista battle for the first time, Triple H faces his biggest challenger yet, CM Punk sets out to prove himself against his biggest naysayer, and Edge and Undertaker bring their rivalry into the infamous Hell in a Cell.

-Our hosts for the evening are Jim Ross and Tazz for Smackdown, Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler for Raw, and Matt Striker and Todd Grisham for ECW.

Montel Vontavious Porter vs. Jeff Hardy
MVP attempts a big boot right out of the gate, but Hardy is ready for him. Hardy lures MVP to ringside and batters him around. Cover by Hardy gets 1. Scoop slam by Hardy and an over the ropes leg drop. Hardy works the arm. MVP gets the rope break and the match restarts. They exchange kicks, with Hardy getting the upper hand. Hardy runs into an overhead belly to belly suplex from MVP, earning a cover for 2. MVP works the head and arm. MVP transitions into a camel clutch. Hardy counters with a monkey flip, but MVP wraps himself around the leg for a hold. Hardy gets a rope break, so MVP kicks him around a bit. Hardy tries to use the ropes for a catapult, but MVP catches him in process and continues to dish out a pounding. MVP places Hardy in the tree of woe, and MVP snaps his head to the mat. Cover by MVP gets 2. Hardy escapes a power bomb and counters with a Neckbreaker. Hardy mule kicks MVP into the corner, but MVP blocks the corner drop-kick. Cover by MVP gets 2.5. MVP drop-kicks Hardy to the corner but Hardy counters the big boot with a clothesline. Side Russian legsweep by Hardy and a pinning combination for 2. MVP counters the corner drop-kick again, but Hardy counters into a sunset flip. Whisper in the Wind by Hardy, who goes high risk. Shelton Benjamin runs in, so Hardy dives onto him on the floor. Hardy goes for the Swanton bomb on MVP, but misses. MVP hits the drive-by kick to the head and picks up the win at 10:10. This was a good way to open the show, ***.
Winner: MVP

Retro Rowe: WWE Great American Bash 2008 Review

-Again, not a review I'm all that proud of, just want to save it for my own reasons. Written in 2008 around the time the pay-per-view aired. 

-They are airing live from Long Island, New York. Our hosts for the evening are Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler for Raw, Jim Ross and Mick Foley for Smackdown, and Mike Adamle and Tazz for ECW.

WWE Tag Team Championship:
John Morrison and The Miz © vs. Curt Hawkins and Zach Ryder vs. Jesse and Festus vs. Finlay and Hornswoggle
Festus clears the ring as the bell sounds. Miz and Morrison dish Hornswoggle into the path of Festus. Hornswoggle rolls up his sleeves for a fight, which is just simply adorable. Festus is distracted, and Hornswoggle launches himself to the floor on the champs. Festus gets his hands on The Miz and dominates him, making a quick tag to Jesse. Monkey flip by Jesse is followed up with a Neckbreaker variation. The Miz kicks out of a cover, but Festus gets a tag and continues the hard hitting assault. There’s an audible “We want Finlay” chant in the building, and the crowd gets their wish, unfortunately Finlay is immediately dropped. Morrison tags and isolates Finlay, keeping things fresh with The Miz. Finlay escapes a hold, but Miz immediately hit’s a side Russian takedown. Morrison tags and catapults onto a propped Finlay. Morrison works a headlock. Finlay fights to his feet, but eats a Neckbreaker. Finlay mounts a comeback against the champions. Zach Ryder gets a blind tag and aggressively jumps Finlay. Hawkins gets a tag and dishes out a beating before tagging his partner back. Finlay hit’s the Celtic Cross on Ryder, but Hawkins prevents a pinfall. Finlay gets a blind shillelagh shot. The Edgeheads rebound and put Finlay in a chinlock. Hornswoggle tags and takes down Ryder with a hurracanrana. Jesse gets a blind tag (to some heat) and cleans house on Ryder. Festus gets a tag and dishes out the punishment onto Ryder, and takes a moment to kick Hawkins off the turnbuckle. Festus fights off Miz and Morrison. Hawkins prevents Jesse and Festus’s double team, and Hawkins and Ryder pick up the win at 9:06. The match was standard, but this was a pretty lousy way to end Miz and Morrison’s lengthy title run, **.
Winners and new WWE Tag Team Champions: Curt Hawkins and Zach Ryder

Retro Rowe: WWE Night of Champions 2008 Review

WWE Night of Champions - June 29, 2008
by SamoaRowe

-Originally written soon after the live airing in 2008. This is not a review I'm particularly proud of, it's very wordy and I think I had my "super mark" hat on while writing more than my "critic" one. Still, I don't want to lose it, so here it is. 

-Every championship in the WWE is on the line. Tonight, Batista and John Cena try to take a World title back to Raw, as they challenge Edge and Triple H.

-Our hosts for the evening are Jim Ross and Mick Foley for Smackdown, Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler for Raw, and Tazz and Mike Adamle for ECW. They are airing live from Dallas, Texas.

WWE Tag Team Championship:
John Morrison and The Miz © vs. Finlay and Hornswoggle
Thanks to the draft, Finlay and Hornswoggle are official ECW superstars now, so the titles aren’t going back to Smackdown any time soon. Finlay and Morrison kick the match off for their respective teams. Finlay dominates early, smashing Morrison with his forearm. Finlay claws the shoulder, but Morrison blocks a turnbuckle smash and reverses. Morrison tries leaping over the ropes onto Finlay on the floor, but Finlay pulls out of the curtain, crotching the Shaman of Sexy. Hornswoggle tries to make the save, but Miz and Morrison drag him into the ring. Finlay makes the save, cleaning house on the champions, and battering Hornswoggle around. Finlay and Morrison are still the legal men, but Miz provides a distraction, allowing the champions to gain momentum. Miz tags works the chin. The champions botch a double team spot, as Finlay falls off of Morrison’s knees as Miz attempted a springboard elbow drop. Miz tags and but takes an inverted atomic drop. Hornswoggle tags and hit’s a tirt-a-whirl head scissors on Miz and a bulldog! Cover by Hornswoggle gets 2. Morrison cheap shots Hornswoggle. Morrison tags and aggressively shoves Hornswoggle around. Miz and Morrison appear frustrated that a leprechaun has given them such a challenge and vent their anger on poor Hornswoggle. Hornswoggle dodges a charging Miz, but Morrison tags and cuts off a tag to Finlay. Hornswoggle sneaks through Morrison’s legs to tag his father. Finlay cleans house on the Miz and Morrison. Finlay hit’s the Celtic Cross on Morrison and positions him for the Tadpole Splash, but Miz makes the save. Morrison tosses Hornswoggle off the top and pins him for the win at 8:48. The right team went over here, but Finlay and Hornswoggle make for a surprisingly effective team. This was entertaining, **½.
Winners and still WWE Tag Team Champions: John Morrison and The Miz

Retro Rowe: WWE One Night Stand 2008 Review

WWE One Night Stand

June 1, 2008
by SamoaRowe

-Originally written pretty close to the live airing in 2008. 

-It’s the “One night a year the WWE goes extreme!” Every match has an “extreme” gimmick attached to it, as we’ll see Singapore cane, last man standing, first blood, stretcher, falls count anywhere, TLC, and “I quit” matches.

-From San Diego, California. Our hosts for the evening are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler for Raw, Michael Cole and Mick Foley for Smackdown, and Mike Adamle and Tazz for ECW.

Falls Count Anywhere match:
Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga
I know, I know, this is something like the millionth match in their never-ending rivalry, but their matches tend to be quality, so I’ll let it go. Hardy starts off by running into Umaga’s elbow. Hard Irish whip by Umaga. Hardy quickly rebounds with Whisper in the Wind. Umaga catches Hardy (attempting a flying cross body) and slams him hard to the mat rather awesomely. Hardy ducks the rampaging Umaga, causing him to crash to the floor. Hardy whips himself onto Umaga on the floor and goes for the cover and gets 2. Umaga whips Hardy into the barricade. Umaga drops a chair Hardy and directs him towards the corner of the floor, nearing the stage. Umaga no-sells a shot from a giant traffic cone and kicks Hardy in the face. Hardy dodges a splash from Umaga, causing the big man to hit the some tech equipment. Hardy uses a fire extinguisher to chase Umaga to the backstage area. From here, the match turns into a 1999 hardcore match, as they brawl up the stairs. Hardy slides down a rail and wipes Umaga out. Cover on the stairs by Hardy gets 2. Umaga huffs and puffs his way up the stairs to chase Hardy and they continue brawling in the lobby and into the parking lot. The parking lot brawl ends up being really entertaining, with lots of use of the parked trucks. Hardy climbs up the side of a truck and kicks Umaga off. Hardy hit’s the swanton bomb off the truck and picks up the win at 9:18. This was silly fun, **.
Winner: Jeff Hardy

Retro Rowe: WWE Backlash 2008 Review

WWE Backlash  

April 27, 2008
by SamoaRowe

-Originally written back in 2008, when I was much worse about thinking I had to mention every little move in my PBP's. 

-From Baltimore, Maryland. Our hosts for the evening are Jerry Lawler and Jim Ross for Raw, Mike Adamle and The Tazz for ECW, and Michael Cole and Mick Foley for Smackdown!

United States Championship:
Montel Vontavious Porter © vs. Matt Hardy
MVP has held on to the U.S. title for eleven months, winning the title in a 2/3 falls match last year at Judgment Day against Chris Benoit. Hardy has been chasing MVP for the belt for over five months, with injuries and other circumstances getting in the way. MVP targets the previously injured knee of Matt Hardy in the early going, but Hardy dodges. Some ground and pound work by MVP until Hardy fires away. MVP flees to ringside to regroup, but Hardy directs him back to the ring. Hip toss by Hardy gets him a cover attempt. Elbow drop by Hardy for another cover. Side headlock takedown by Hardy. Elbow off the turnbuckles by Hardy gets yet another cover. Even Michael Cole admits that these covers are not designed to end the match, but wear down MVP. MVP rebounds with a suplex and plants Hardy on the top rope. MVP climbs, but Hardy knocks him off, but MVP blocks a moonsault! Snapmare by MVP and a knee drop for a cover. MVP stretches Hardy’s midsection. Knees to the gut by MVP, using the ropes for leverage. Hardy counters and gets a cover. Belly to belly suplex by MVP for a near fall, followed by a series of elbow drops (for yet another cover). MVP drops Hardy with a back press slam. Hardy hit’s a desperate clothesline, and both men are down. Corner clothesline and bull dog by Hardy gets a 2 count. MVP blocks a side effect and hangs him up on the ropes. Hardy blocks the playmaker and hit’s the side effect for a close 2 count. Hardy goes high risk, but MVP drop-kicks him. MVP climbs up, and gets a side effect off the top for good measure! Hardy is slow to gain the cover, so MVP kicks out. MVP blocks the twist of fate with a backslide, Hardy kicks out and goes for a school boy. MVP blocks the twist of fate again and punishes Hardy in the corner. MVP kicks Hardy in the head, sending him to ringside. Hardy is almost counted out, rolls back to the ring, only for another kick to the skull. MVP sizes Hardy up for the win, charges and misses a kick in the corner. Hardy hit’s the twist of fate and gets the pin fall victory at 11:29! MVP’s 11 month reign is over! The match was solid, but not as lively as some of their previous outings, **½.
Winner and new United States Champion: Matt Hardy

Retro Rowe: WWE Armageddon 2007 Reviews

WWE Armageddon 2007

December 16, 2007 by Samoa Rowe

-Follow me on Twitter @samoarowe

-From Pittsburgh, PA. Our hosts are Michael Cole and JBL for Smackdown, Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler for Raw, and Joey Styles and Tazz for ECW.

United States Championship:
MVP © vs. Rey Mysterio

MVP is in the midst of what would go on to be an 11 month title reign. Rey had nothing better to do this month. Rey quickly escapes MVP’s grappling attempts. Rey shows MVP what’s up with a hurricanrana. The referee prevents Rey from making a dive, so Rey has to jump over him, wiping out MVP in the process. MVP finally counters, dropping Rey head-first into the corner. We get the obligatory heat period, as MVP targets the head. Rey lands on his feet on a press slam attempt and kicks MVP into the ropes. Rey makes his comeback, complete with a springboard lateral press. Mysterio botches a springboard leg senton and might have injured himself in the process. Rey recovers and modifies his offense with a back senton off the ropes. MVP smells blood and nails a hard clothesline. They battle on the top until Mysterio nails a top rope hurricanrana. MVP delivers a big boot for 2. Rey counters with a reverse DDT for another near fall. Rey misses 619 and settles for a hurricanrana off the apron. MVP has had enough and allows himself to get counted out at 11:27. Cheap finish to an otherwise cookie cutter match, **.
Winner via count-out: Rey Mysterio

Retro Rowe: WWE Survivor Series 2007 Review

WWF Survivor Series 2007
by SamoRowe

November 18, 2007

-Follow me on Twitter @samoarowe 

-From Miami, FL. Our hosts are Joey Styles, Tazz, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jim Ross, and Jerry Lawler.

ECW Championship:
CM Punk © vs. The Miz vs. John Morrison

It’s worth noting that The Miz and Morrison had just won the WWE Tag Team Championship leading into this event. Punk has to fend off a double team attack in the early going. Punk tosses both opponents to ringside for a suicide dive! Miz blocks Punk’s springboard attempt on Morrison. Double suplex by Miz and Morrison! It doesn’t take long for Miz to stab Morrison in the back, pushing off the ropes to the floor. Morrison interrupts a Miz chinlock, delivering a slingshot drop-kick. Backbreaker/neck breaker combo by Morrison almost puts Punk away. Punk breaks out of a sleeper with some hard kicks, but gets tossed to Miz, who drops Punk back-first on the concrete. Miz and Morrison trade near falls. Morrison debuts Starship Pain but Punk breaks the cover attempt. Top rope hurricanrana by Punk sends Morrison into a Miz power bomb! Double underhook backbreaker on Miz by Punk! Miz accidentally knocks Morrison off the apron, leaving Punk to deliver Go To Sleep for the win at 7:58. Fine opener that didn’t expose the limitations of the challengers, good victory for Punk, **¼.
Winner and still ECW Champion: CM Punk

Retro Rowe: WWE Cyber Sunday 2007 Review

WWE Cyber Sunday
October 28th 2007

by SamoaRowe

-Democracy has come to the WWE Universe. Tonight, fans will vote for match participants and stipulations.

-From Washington D.C. Our hosts are Michael Cole and JBL for Smackdown, Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler for Raw, and Joey Styles and Tazz for ECW. Todd Grisham is on the stage to announce the results to each poll.

Stretcher match:
Rey Mysterio vs. Finlay
Finlay looks pleased about the stretcher stipulation. Rey matches Finlay’s brawling in the early going. Finlay baseball slides Rey onto the stretcher, bringing the fight to ringside. Finlay can’t keep Rey on the stretcher so he works on wearing him down. Rey goes on the offensive with a hurricanrana. They both eye the shillelagh on the poll (one of the losing stipulations) which sets up a sunset flip power bomb by Rey! Rey grabs the weapon but Finlay takes it and punishes him. Finlay drives the stretcher into Rey. Mysterio returns the favor and hit’s a modified 619! Rey nails a back senton onto the stretcher, but some loose cables prevent him from winning. The padding comes off, Finlay gets dropped on it, and the stretcher rolls past the white line. Rey wins at 9:42! This was a very entertaining, and at times creative, brawl. Also, I like stretcher matches, ***.
Winner: Rey Mysterio